Does my child get to decide what parent he wants to live with?

many divorce cases involve legitimate issues of custody and parenting time. For my clients who find themselves in the situation it is understandably a frustrating and emotionally draining aspect of their case.  No matter how the issue of custody is resolved undeniable that each parent will have lots of time with their child then they may wish to have.
When attempting to resolve custody disputes the starting point is the New Jersey  custody statute which enumerates all of the relevant factors the parties, the attorneys, and the court are to consider. All of these factors are designed to identify what is in the child’s best interest.  I often have to remind clients that the decision will not be made based upon what they may want to see happen, what their spouse may want to have happen, or even one of the child may prefer.
Clients often ask if it is appropriate or helpful to have their child testify in court or speak with the judge. My opinion, and one that I believe is shared by judges throughout the state, is that the parents, the attorneys, and the court should take all steps necessary to keep children out of the court room and out of the center of custody dispute.
Placing children in the middle of the dispute can be devastating for the child and negatively impact of the parent-child relationship for years to come. Although it is possible that a court my interview a child under very limited circumstances, it is still not advisable it’s a stuck routine limitation. Even after meeting with a child of the judge can choose to disregard the preferences and opinions expressed by that child.  This reality can compound the child’s frustration and created anger and confusion over why their opinions were not considered or implemented.